About Me
Name: Kelly Wolske

Maryland born, Florida raised, and transplanted to the Mojave for the love of my husband. Big Red's wife, Tele's mom, part time student. Child of God, Christ follower, United Methodist in exile. More than anything I strive to hear His voice every single day.

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Reading: The Pilgrim's Progress
Project: Sewing/ craft corner

Thursday, May 25, 2006
I love you... woman?

My DH and his other half (and I am pretty sure it is correct to say literally here, but I know someone will correct me if I am wrong) talk with fair regularity. Z-man calls Red when he's making the trek home from work. Anyway.

As most of these calls are in the evening hours, I can hear at least one side of the conversation (if you know anything about these guys, you understand that often, I can hear the entire conversation). I eavesdrop shamelessly, as J is a complete clam afterwards. Our post-family-telephone-call exchange is something like this:

Me: So, how is everything with your [mom, dad, sister, brother and T, brother and K]
J: Fine, good.
Me: Any news?
J: No, not really.
Me: Everybody healthy, happy, etc.?
J: I think so. I guess.
Me: So...
J: Yeah...

Perhaps this is to prepare me for teenagers, should we ever have any. I don't know. I digress...

The part that really gets me tickled is signing off, especially signing off from other half. (I am going to use quotes here, but only for clarity.)

"Well, we are at Best Buy now, have to get a wireless router for Kelly's new laptop. Be sure and give everyone hugs, and I'll talk to you later. I love you, man."

Yes, "I love you, man."

I am wondering about this interesting behavior. Usually, an "I love you man" is followed by a "but" or "You're not getting my Bud Light." J, however, uses this phrase alone. A complete thought. This raises a few questions in my mind:

1) Do other men do this? I mean with your closest friends and family.

2) Does J do this when there is noone to overhear, or is it simply for the benefit of whoever may be listening? Or does he think someone is always listening?

3) Why why why?

Thirty years in the world, and I wonder if I will ever understand these things. I never say, "I love you, woman" when closing a phone conversation with my sister, or any girfriends. Why not?

Maybe I'll try it. Maybe my sister will think I have finally cracked. Maybe I have.

  posted at 7:00 AM  

At 5/25/2006 11:27:00 AM, Blogger Big Red said...

It's totally to maintain the macho-manlyness of being a man. I love my brothers and Sister. THere is always that statement at the end of the phone call, I just happen to say, Love you man, or love you sis. be a guy for a day, you'll understand, it would be totally Brokeback-ish to just say I love you to a dude, that's right next to saying 'I can't quit you' to a dude, ugghh.

Sometimes guys interact and do 'man-ish' things and it is another way of reflecting the mutual respect they have for each other, it's just not coming out and saying "I love you' and it's totally O.K., Guys know what means what, so there.

At 5/25/2006 11:36:00 AM, Blogger The Bass Player's Wife said...

Do you really want me to be a guy? Even for a day? Sheesh! Talk about "Brokebackish"


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